


Don't Bring Alcohol to a War Zone

by FriendlyStalker



Category: Gintama
Genre: Breaking the Fourth Wall, But that's gintama for you, Developing Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Porn With Plot, Seduction, Sexual Humor, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:49:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27889306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FriendlyStalker/pseuds/FriendlyStalker
Summary: The Shinsengumi came back to Edo to fight against the Altana Liberation Army. As their assistant, it is your duty to lend a hand in all sorts of related tasks... This one involves alcohol, disorderly citizens and a much needed break for the vice-commander, Hijikata.
Relationships: Hijikata Toshirou/Original Female Character(s), Hijikata Toshirou/You, Hijikata Toshirou/reader
Kudos: 28





	Don't Bring Alcohol to a War Zone

**Author's Note:**

> This shameless smut with plot takes place during the Silver Soul Arc, chapter 629. 
> 
> I would like to point out english isn't my first language, so sorry if anything seems a bit wonky :)

"You say s'mthin?"

"No, nothing at all."

Hijikata slid the door, closing it in one swift motion. You had heard him rushing in to warn everyone of the news that Gengai had fallen into enemy's hands, but he resigned the thought of backup as he was quickly turned around by Tsukuyo and the ongoing drinking fest happening in there. As he turned his back to the door, his eyes found you coming down the hallway with a handful of bottles.

"Are you really bringing them more? Last I checked weren't we in a war zone?" he inquired.

"Kondo might need some, considering he is half-naked and hanging from a wall," you stated. "As for Gintoki If I am not mistaken, Tsukuyo's already shoving some down his throat-"

"I believe we will have to find him ourselves since the wounded are currently being self-medicated..." he remarked, ready to take off again.

"You should take a breather vice-commander. I know time is of the essence but I doubt you want to end up with them in that room."

"Yeah, you should Hijikata," said Okita as he turned the corner, catching up. "Didn't you say we should enjoy this mortal coil while we can? Was it sleep or a partner for you-know-what?"

"Forget the first option," you added pointing to the room with a free hand, after dropping the bottles by the door.

Amongst the noises were Gintoki's potential calls for help between each mouthful of alcohol. It was hard to tell if the expression Hijikata gave you both was resignation or irritation. Probably the latter.

"Second it is then," Okita said, slowly walking back from whence he came. "And remember Hijikata, no means no."

"What are you implying here?!"

"Forget the sadist," you poked in. "Let us find a quieter spot that doesn't reek of booze so you can rest a bit before heading back out there."

After a few steps, you turned around and noticed he wasn't following. While you made eye contact, you could see he was strongly hesitating. His priorities never wavered with the years, it was obvious he pressured himself to run back to the men and take care of the problem at hand.

"Hijikata," you repeated calmly. "They are probably taking a moment to breathe, drink and piss. So should you."

You motionned once more for him to follow. When he finally caved in, you led him deeper down the hall, to the last standing door. The walls from there were either broken or simply gone. There has been fighting earlier, but it was now safe and the perimeter has been established. Hijikata still toke a quick look around as he stepped in the nearly empty room, except for a few futons and boxes of supplies. You didn't blame him for it, considering his vocation and that the Liberation Army had troops all over the damn place. You were fairly nervous as well, but allowed yourself to lighten up a bit with everyone resting or passing out from exhaustion or with the help of alcohol.

"I can't help but notice you've been more restless since you stopped smoking..." you mentionned.

"Trying to," he corrected, knowing very well he failed more than a few times. "I'll admit a smoke would be quite a relief right now."

"I can imagine," you added. "I've been setting up this room just in case. Gathered all I could find in the building here that could serve as supplies. Thought the alcohol could serve as disinfectant in the worst case scenario but considering they served themselves, figured I might as well hand them the rest."

Hijikata sat on one of the futon and let out a huge sigh, making it obvious he was tired. He laid his sword to the side, but still at hand's reach. Meanwhile, you dug into a box and brought him a bottle of water. He gladly toke it and began downing it. You dusted off your uniform's coat and held the dress you worn under as you kneeled beside him. You never stopped wearing your traditional western clothing even when you moved to Edo. The demon vice commander finished his last sip and put the empty bottle away. For a moment, he stared silently at you. Your locks brushed your shoulders as you gazed away, distracted. You looked so at peace, as if nothing could possibly disturb you. It comforted him in a way, that these dark times the Shinsengumi had gone through lately had not broken you. But he, Kondo, Okita and the Yorozura knew where you came from and that it wasn't the first time you've seen death and destruction at the hands of your common invaders.

"The uniform fits you" he said with a smile.

"Glad you guys finally let me into the club, what, two years later? " you answered jokingly. "That was a lot of bloody laundry - and I really mean the bloody part of it - to clean for the recognition and I'm not getting started on the errands."

"Are you gonna skip the paperwork part? Filing the public indecency cases as 'Softcorn alien porn' and 'Misunderstood kinks'?"

"I think comissionning these cool new coats can let that one slide under the table... And for all the testosterone, danger and amount of dumbness I endured. Do you know how many times I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water only to see someone chugging a gallon of milk while scratching their ballsack?"

In all honesty, you had no regrets working for the Shinsengumi. Weird things have been seen, admittedly, but the salary was more than enough to afford the drinks to forget. Such steady income for the same means couldn't be said for Gintoki. But it quickly became your home and purpose. While you didn't do the hard and dangerous part of the job, you were the helping hand at the headquarters. Colleagues became friends and you learned the boundaries, your place, and ended up earning everyone's respect. It was a much needed new start for you.

"You know sodomy is a crime where I'm from?" you remarked.

"Why exactly should I know that?" he asked, uneasy.

"Because while this show takes place in Edo, you're not the only nation on this planet - The Amantos fucked us all from the gun blazing colonies to samurai country. This is turning into one of these scenarios where one country decides the fate of the entire world, you know?"

"And where does the sodomy come into play in that?!"

Now truly confused, Hijikata just shrugged it off as a spur of the moment, but it quickly became evident.

"Nostalgic, I guess. We both have a home we can't go back to... But we made this ours. I'm probably pmsing. I just wish there was as much snow here in winter to put the Neo Armstrong Cannon to shame."

He was about to ask still, how possibly the sodomy could be linked to the nostalgia, but he abandonned the case. Hijikata had long resigned himself to these weird trains of thoughts of yours since you were always helping during the worst part of his job, the office hours. It became just a little bit more bearable with your presence which was at first bothersome, but you bought his acceptance by offering to do most of the paperwork up to his signature... And the occasional salmon pasta salad with twice the mayo quantity required in the actual recipe. Before you knew it, Kondo innocently called you "Toshi's hand" without realising the amount of bad jokes that would spawn from the title.

"The way you speak of your homeland's winters I would have expected you to carry a shovel, not a gun..." he added.

"It must be satisfying to smash someone's face with," you admitted. "But it's probably why our stand against the Amanto was short lived when you think about it... We just had to bring shovels to a gun fight. I still don't understand how you guys manage with your swords."

"Plot armor, arguably. Don't know how much longer it will apply, though."

You gave him a curious glance, followed with a smile. That sort of reaction sparked a glint of worry in his eyes.

"So this might be the end, hum? Is that why you and Sougo spoke about emptying your..."

"Hold it there," he cut you off. "It's just another case of him twisting the meaning of my words."

From that distance, the first thing you noticed was how his clothes didn't smell of cigarette anymore. You still weren't used to it.

"I mean I get it, really" you teased. "If the whole place wasn't crumbling down I would have taken a trip to the Red Light District to bring back the men some company with the Shinsengumi's business credit card - It's not like such expanses never showed up on the bills anyway. Since it's obviously superintendent Matsudaira I've always let it slip."

Hijikata had no time to process that information before you dumped some more.

"At least on your end you always paid for these services with your own salary."

Seeing how he completely froze, you finished your trail of thought.

"Don't react as if I just found your porn folder, I mean the one who saw you was no better himself. In fact, he was way worst, stranded in just his underwear after emptying his wallet at the casino and completely wasted."

That's it. If Tsukuyo wasn't going to finish the job tonight, Gintoki was going to get glassed in the face before he could die a hero.

"I was on my way back from a drink with Otae after her shift. Found him, so I helped him back home," you explained. "So yeah I saw you too, but he was the one being frantic and laughing about it when he wasn't throwing up on my feet. Now don't go and kill him, he probably doesn't even remember. And I mean why do you people always react ashamed about these things? Is it cultural or something? I'm missing the point."

"It's called a secret garden for a reason!" he added, irked.

He looked away for a moment, trying to compose himself. He mentally disciplined himself for looking like an angry fool just now. You always made dirty jokes and observations, why did he feel so uncomfortable now when none of this would matter if everyone died by tomorrow? His brain suddenly focused on the fact that you had to give yourself the trouble for Gintoki. Even dead drunk, the man wouldn't have crossed any line, no. He was just the Yorozura, who helped you when you arrived in Edo as a refugee to start anew, a good friend whom you felt in debt with. Hijikata felt honestly pathetic, lingering on that, but he had to know.

"Look, I know the Shinsengumi works hard to maintain an image," he sighed. "But don't feel constrained outside of your work. You are free to do as you please with whoever you want."

"What?" you blurted out. "Oh, Toshi... I just dropped him dead on his couch and came back with pancakes the next morning to make sure he didn't drown in his own bodily fluids and that Kagura wouldn't starve for breakfast. Don't worry, it was a day off. These are but small opportunities to show him my gratitude. Granted, by giving him diabetes, but still."

Hijikata knew he dug his own grave there. So he just grasped his sword and slowly got up in a weird motion. His legs were noticeably still tired from all that running. You also got up swiftly, sort of instinctively, following the lead of your vice commander as you do often in the context of work. 

"I have to get back out there," he spoke. "We got an old man to rescue."

You simply nodded, feeling as if you pushed in a little too much this time. Teasing him was one thing, but making him uncomfortable was the last thing you had on your mind. Your gaze followed him as he slowly walked to the door, silently. It tore you inside, you didn't want your potential last moment with him to be cold like this.

"Hijikata..."

He stopped by the door as you called out to him. All the nonchalance, sarcasm or confidence you had in your every words you ever shared with him was gone. You sounded so lost, he hated it.

"I could have gone back home after the Shinsengumi left Edo. After two years, the rebellion is over... Life goes on. I guess I just got used to living here with you guys."

You needed all of your focus to keep your voice from cracking, so he would go into battle with a clear mind. You carefully chose your words.

"The Shinsengumi became my home. I may not have your back on the battlefield, but everytime any of you were out there risking your lives, I made it my mission to make you all feel at home when you came back. I always prayed for every single one of you to make it back. All the men. Kondo, Okita, Saitou, Yamazaki, Sasaki... You. All of you are home."

Hijikata slightly turned, enough for you to meet each other's gaze. Without exchanging a word, you knew that you were going through the same range of emotions. Pain, fear, love... Acceptance. Neither of you could really describe it. It just all made sense in the contemplation that this was maybe your last day alive... And that in the end, no one wants to die alone.

"There is no where else I'd rather be" you finished.

A sincere smile formed on your lips. You didn't expect Hijikata to reciprocate with any words, being himself. But you were fine with it and at peace with yourself for confessing. He chuckled and laid his head against the door, while his free hand reached for the lock on the door. You just stood there and watched, curiously. He looked so tense... You've had moments in the past, as giving him massages here and there when it was much needed after a day of physical work. He was relunctant at first, but he just gave in when you started bickering that he had to see himself as a machine and have some maintenance done. The machine part was quite accurate considering the amount of overtime he always did. They were strangely intimate bonding opportunities. But you both managed to be poker face professionals about it. At least that is what you convinced yourself to believe.

"Locking the door?" you lightly jested. "To keep out the aliens or the drunks?"

Truthfully, you knew why. All of it was in the slow pace that allowed him to free himself from his coat and the conviction in his steps as he made his way back to you. Not once in the process did he divert his attention from you and you, from him. You were enthralled by the man who now stood just a few inches in front of you. As if an order was given, but without a word, you complied. You gently reached for his sword he still held onto and crouched to lay it down. You did the same with your gun hidden in your own coat. With intent, you got back up a little closer to him, brushing your chest against his. The gesture dissipated any doubt that he might have misread your willingness to do this. 

"If it's the last thing you do this god forsaken blue planet," you started. "Be it ravishing me."

Well, this was officially out of the way. You reached for his collar and brought his lips to yours.

"You liar..." you whispered, slightly breaking the kiss.

Your lips remained close enough to brush against one another. You gazed at each other for a few seconds, settling in such intimacy.

"I told you," he smirked. "I'm trying."

The light taste of cigarette in his mouth was actually no bother, none at all. But you couldn't miss the opportunity to bust him. He allowed you no time to respond, as his lips locked with yours again. He wasted no time sliding his hands into your coat, helping you slide it off your shoulders without parting from the kiss. Yours started unbuttoning his jacket and his shirt under. Your fingers delicately traced his torso, still tense from all the fighting, earning a subtle groan from him. His hands wandered, one went up to caress the back of your neck softly and the other to grip your hip. He stopped, looking down at you tenderly yet, eagerly. Puzzled, you lifted your hands to his face, slowly tracing his jaw. He seized one and kissed it as it swept by his lips. The look he gave you might as well have been a packaged bomb because what followed was just as surprising. With haste, he pulled the top of your dress off your shoulders, allowing it to fall to the floor, leaving you only in your corset and underwear.

"Now hold on," you muttered. "That's-"

You couldn't finish your sentence, as he toke off his jacket. The shirt followed, but in a slower motion as it fit more tightly on his well built body. One you toke pleasure studying, which didn't escape his notice.

"Nevermind then."

His gaze remained on your body, inspecting every curves, amplified by your upper garment. It wasn't his first time seeing one - But it was his first experience with a woman wearing one. While you were no stranger to exposing yourself to a man, a few seconds more and he would have managed to make you blush. So you pressed yourself against him, engaging into another heated kiss. His grasp found its way on your ass, letting a slight gasp escape from your lips. His tantalizing grin pressed you further into action. He laid his head on yours to allow you to work on unbuckling his belt. His apparent longing, now evident to your eyes, sent a wave of warmth throughout your body. Curious, you ran your fingers up his length through his pants. His breathing got heavier at your touch, so did his voice.

"Lay down," he grunted.

"Is that an order, vice-commander?" you teased.

You could feel him flinch at the use of his title in that context. You couldn't hold back a chuckle, but obeyed as you lowered yourself on the futon you stood by. Hijikata toke off his pants and enthralled you with the display of his nearly bare body. Sure, you've already seen him in a swimsuit and just a towel on a spa trip - Except on that occasion him and all the guys came out of there bloodied up or mentally scarred and you never found out why... But this time, it truly struck as a mating display, for the lack of better words. Just as you wished and asked, he was about to fuck you. It would be a lie to say you haven't dreamt or thought about it, hell, the occasional flirty joke of yours never truly went under his radar but you understood and respected the reasons why he ignored them. He dealt with so many idiots in the daily, and you had no qualm admitting to yourself you were a lusty one at times. An hint of mischief gleamed in your eyes as you bent forward, face inches away from his manhood. You wanted to surprise him, make him realize how much you desired him. This was maybe your last chance to do so anyway.

"Hijikata" you purred his name as your fingers clutched at the waistband of his boxers.

His stare was so intense, no words were needed for him to press you on. You pulled them down, releasing his erect member. You traced your tongue along its length without breaking eye contact with him. This would have been a dream scenario to toy with him - But considering one of his men or worst could come breaking down the door at any moment, you opted to go straight for the goal. His eyes closed to savor the bliss of your mouth taking him whole. You stroke his member and changed the rhythm accordingly when one of his hand found its way into your hairs, giving in to the pleasure. Every now and then you looked up, longing for him yourself. He probably noticed himself, or feared to end this so soon, as he gently held your head back and slid his aching cock out of your mouth.

"Here" he said as he held out a hand, motioning you to get up.

You gladly toke it. He pulled you up and made quick work of unclasping your corset front hooks, then tossed it carefully to the side.

"We should hurry," you mentioned as he glanced at your belly, then your breasts. "Your men are probably done pissing."

"Not if they chug down the rest of the alcohol you left there," he answered as he began kissing your neck.

"That's a bit out of character for you to say, Hijikata..." you moaned as you purposely pushed your lower body against his erection.

"As if smoking was my only vice."

"Well - All that smoke easily clouded the others."

He ignored that witty comment and brought you back to the moment with another kiss and a hand groping your breast. With his fingers, he caressed your nipple for a bit. As he felt your body melt against him, he held you tight and lowered you unto the futon, placing himself on top of you. Your panties were then reunited with your corset. Tension built up in your pelvis as he made his way down to your folds, until his thumb fondled your clit. You felt rather exposed as he studied your reaction, which mostly consisted of breathing heavier and spreading your legs further. There was a hint of a smile, one that expressed how much he wanted you to enjoy this ride. He toke his sweet time, admiring you at his mercy. He inserted one finger at a time, up to three, relishing the sensation of your walls clamping around them. While it was one way to get back at you for all the little troubles you gave him over time... It was mostly intoxicating and surreal to see you that way.

"Hijikata-"

"Hum?"

Truthfully, he didn't expect you to flip him to the side and straddle him. He remained startled for a brief instant, but quickly learned to enjoy the new angle. So did you.

"Told you that you need to rest these legs," you prodded.

He held in what would have been an instinctive retort as he felt your wetness against his tip. Without further delay, you lowered your hips with ease until he was fully inside you. The groan that followed was music to your ears. Hopefully he was busy looking elsewhere and didn't notice that smug face of yours for a split second there...

"You feel so good," you muttered as you began riding him.

Because saying you could die like this could bite you back in the ass any moment under the circumstances. You held onto one of his arm, lifting it up to your face to nuzzle the palm of his hand. The other one was left to grip your bare hip. You adjusted your pacing, riding him harder under his guidance. You let go of his hand, allowing it to wander back down to your breast and finally, your clit. He carefully swirled his fingers around it. You accidently slipped a low moan and saw his sly grin from the corner of your eye.

"Is this turning into some sort of twisted teasing competition?" you whimpered.

"Says the woman who kept telling me to relax, enjoy myself more..." he replied roughly. "You should be happy I am."

Pleased with that answer, you admitted defeat by accelerating your pace. The pressure building up became harder by the minutes not to get lost into. The sight of you mounting him so eagerly was driving him to the edge. He began rubbing your clit more viciously, sensing your flesh tighten around his manhood. A wave of heat overwhelmed you. You twitched and squirmed as he continued his course while you came. You sighed in relief and delight, coming back to your senses. Hijikata was obviously on the edge himself by that point. He gestured you off him and guided you to lay beside him on the futon. 

"Your legs-"

Your worries were cut short as he left you no time for anticipation. He was now on top, his cock full of your juices throbbing against you. You had a quick glimpse of it before he planted his lips on yours, melting you in a warm and soft kiss as he positioned himself between your legs. You gasped as he buried himself deep into you. Both of your breathing became more irregular with each thrust. You were so wet and had already worked him so much that it was hard to tell which pounding would be the last as you nibbled his neck between each. He sped up for a few more and pulled out, stroking himself for a second before spilling his seeds on your stomach. You observed the hot mess on your belly as well as the firm grip Hijikata had on his member and couldn't help but smile.

"I have no intention to leave behind a potential widow and single mom," he jested.

He turned over and laid beside you to catch his breath, pulling you against him and into another kiss.

"Thank you for your consideration" you replied with the same tone. "May I inquire about the widow part though? I mean - Is that a confession?"

Again, that same look on his face for digging his own grave. You jerked up and laughed it off as you both cleaned up, got dressed and gathered your belongings. He was obviously just bewildered by his own choice of words... At your grand amusement.

"Don't strain yourself now," you warned him. "I would like us to have a rerun of this episode."

A simple smile hinted that the feeling was mutual. While it was never light heartedly that you bid him farewell to a battle, this time you felt strangely optimistic after being so... Open, to each other. No matter the outcome, you would hold onto that moment.

"Don't forget you are still on the job too," he signaled as he opened the door for the both of you. "I would rather not come back to a case of public intoxication and if you can, please, unhang Kondo from the wall."

"Yes, vice-commander."

You both shared one last embrace, before going back to your respective duties.


End file.
